Yesterday, I went shopping for donuts. Today, I’m wondering how I’m going to pay my credit card bill next month. You see, I wanted to get donuts for a small family Chanukah party. How much could it cost already for a dozen – twenty bucks? Not a problem, I’m happy to spend that money in exchange for a smile. But as I prepared to leave, it was made very clear to me that the standard jelly and custard donuts I’ve been accustomed to for my entire life were no longer “chic.” “These days,” I was told, “you have to get the nicer donuts or else you’re a nerd.” Odd, but alright, nicer donuts it’ll be, I decided. I went to a local store and asked for a dozen of their upper-end donuts. The worker behind the counter was very courteous and helped me choose between the dozen-or-so varieties they had to offer, each one more tantalizing than the one before it. After boxing up my catch, my credit card was swiped and then I took that fateful look at the receipt. My jaw literally dropped and my eyes bulged. “$111 for 12 donuts?!?! You’ve got to be kidding,” I said to the cashier. He looked at me dumbfounded. “Yeah, that’s pretty standard,” he replied, staring at me like I’d fallen off the moon. Shaken up, I drove back home and demanded an explanation. Everyone had the same reaction as the cashier – sure, $111 for a dozen donuts is totally normal nowadays. Now, lest I make myself to sound like an old, grumpy man, let me assure you that I am not that. I am very open-minded and I embrace revolutionary ideas and new ways of doing things with zest and vigor (I’m even writing this on an iPad – no dinosaur zeidy here!). But guys, c’mon. We’ve completely fallen off our rockers! Whatever happened to Chanukah being a time for family and friends to fulfill our happiness needs? Whatever happened to Chanuka being a celebration of ruchniyus over gashmiyus? Whatever happened to good old sensibility? If you’re not a millionaire, you can’t afford these donuts. Can you get by? Sure, perhaps so. But these donuts don’t fit into your budget in any way, shape, or form. They’re an unnecessary, gluttonous expense. And somehow, the stores baking them, or the society trumpeting them, has made it not only commonplace to spend these sickening amounts of money on donuts, but you’re actually a “nerd” if you don’t! This is what happens when the insane people start running the asylum. When you have individuals in the community who spend their money (or more likely, rack up credit card debt) like drunken sailors, and those same people are seen as individuals to follow and emulate, the chickens will wind up coming home to roost. With all the terribly high, and rising, expenses frum families are already facing, from clothing to food to tuition, do we really need the fleeting gooey goodness of a overpriced donut that tastes no better than the “nerdy” ones? It says that kol haragil b’ner havei lo banim chachomim. With the stupidity surrounding the deluxe donut craze and retarded spending habits in general, we desperately need children to grow up with more sense than their pparents. So better get moving […]

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